In the annals of awesome parenting, I thought I would be pretty high up there with my recent scoring of a Minecraft Essentials book at the library. I even had to put it on hold, and when I got the message from the library that it was in, I raced over to retrieve it after work. I thumbed through it excitedly during stoplights on the way home, thinking I was going to gain major child pleasing points when I walked in the door.

As I entered, I waved the book in Penguin’s direction. He was, of course, playing Minecraft, so I had to tempt him away from Minecraft with the promise of even more Minecraft. He excitedly flipped through the book and asked me to read him the recommended tips and tricks. As I did, the most common refrain was, “Yes, I know that…I know that…Actually, it is better if you…That doesn’t work, but…I knew that…Yes…I do it this way…”

And so on and so forth throughout the book. It should come as no surprise, of course, since he regularly schools his father on how to play and has all but given up on me. I tried to play once, and he enacted that same patient voice that I engage any time I am trying to teach him something but it’s clear he’s not getting it so can I just do it for you already? He says he wants me to play with him more, but I’m not sure his love of me can withstand my total lack of player skills.

Ah well. He still enjoys me reading from the book and looking at the pictures. And if I do take him up on his offer to play again, the book will be just MY speed.